As some of you might know, I am still neither here nor there with church.
Not because my church is bad; in fact I've been blessed by the strong and solid biblical teaching!
And doesn't mean I'm not going to church either; have been going for bible study and services. I hope it's not because I'm not willing to adjust/adapt.
But I guess the crux of the matter is theology & church beliefs.
As noted, I do admit I'm quite lazy and as long as things are fine, I prefer to leave it as that. I sometimes dislike my own mind as it drives me into ideas, social & political issues..all that keeps me deep in thought, exaggerates my seriousness when all I want to do is chill.
But I guess I just cannot avoid this whole church theology issue anymore.
I must say that on one hand, it is not really that important what theological beliefs one has because at the end of the day, repentance and obedience to Jesus is the most important thing.
Yet it is also important to know why we believe in the things we believe or choose go to a certain church and not the other. (esp in my confused case!)
In Malaysia, the situation is slightly different..perhaps our theological practices overlap more, which is why I've never really struggled with this and probably why although eg:Cindy went to a Baptist church while I went to a charismatic methodist church, everything we believed about the bible were similar
In Malaysia, a Charismatic church is part of the NECF (National Evangelical Christian Fellowship). Our CF never really had problems with inter-denominations. A Lutheran pastor could come and speak while we sang Hillsong songs..and it would be okay!
The situation here is slightly different.
And it's hard to put into words; but in a nutshell...each denomination is different. (duh, haha)
At first I thought, hey yea while my church is not "charismatic" but it's okay. I don't think that the display of the gifts of the holy spirit should be a major criteria in choosing churches anyway. It's fine if people do speak in tongues and if people don't. It's fine if no one lifts up their hands. I can adapt to a different worship culture; even if they don't sing the songs I sing at home.
But I guess beyond the external differences, there's is a different emphasis in spiritual interpretation that filters all the way down to the way bible study is conducted, the way prayer is practiced, issues of faith, if you believe in fasting or not and so on (yea, I can't believe it... I've never questioned if fasting should be practiced or not till recently!)
This is not a fun struggle. I dislike being unsure about church. I want to settle. The only upside to this is that I''m learning lots of new things that I never knew before!
Did you know Pentecostals believe that baptism of Holy Spirit must be accompanied by speaking of tongues?
And that in the Charismatic movement, the baptism of the Holy Spirit is separate from receiving the Holy Spirit during salvation conversion? I always thought so too ..but according to the book "I believe in the Holy Spirit" it is not...emm..
So yea, this is just the tip of the iceberg about the questions and uncertainties that are running through my head. It's confusing!
And I don't want to be biased towards what I've been brought up in so I'm reading two opposite books, "The Charismatic Chaos" and "I believe in the Holy Spirit"
One helpful thing I've read was a commentary that in Revelation, there were 7 different churches each with their own weaknesses and strengths. Probably just like in the churches today; where certain churches are strong in numbers, others are strong in sermons, another strong in missions....there is no perfect church after all.
I guess I've managed to bore you if you are reading all the way till now...
I am quite frustrated over this; do pray for me that I'd be able to discern if God wants me to stay put at my church or otherwise. :)
3 comments:
what are the theological beliefs in your church at the moment that you are having issues with?
hey, yea....i was brought up in an AOG background...i believed that baptism of the HS must be accompanied by speaking in tongues and a second baptism for that matter. But ever since i attended CF in A levels i was more 'exposed'...and i struggled very much in the whole denomination issue ever since i got together with matt, which is good in a sense, because i don't want to just look at a scripture and say,"It says this...because that's what my pastor says or how I've been taught in my church"...but to say that i think it says this because I have read the Bible with no preconceptions, and in context of all i know, it is what i believe it says(which is very frustrating at times because there's just no way to arrive at a definate answer). It is really easier to just believe in something because it is what your pastor or church says...which, i feel, is what many people do... because it really is the easier path. Right now i don't believe that the baptism of the HS must be accompanied by speaking in tongues, altho i still attend a pentecostal church...about whether there's such a thing as a second baptism...erm...i believe that it's different for each person as to when it happens...if it happens(ok, I'm still confused :P). Like eu pui says, what matters is basic doctrines, that we are all evangelicals and most importantly (i feel, and know) that love prevails. Oh, a few of us managed to push thru a topic on denominations and how to 'cope' with it in CF *I'm the one who suggested :)* Pray that God sends the best speaker for it...take care sarah...
linda, an evangelical
Jon: haha, too complex..and it's hard to write openly because I really want to try to avoid judging/ criticizing the practices of the church I'm going to and also the dilemas of why I am not switching/have not switched to another church in sydney which is famous & all of us in m'sia are familiar with.
Linda: yea. Personally i don't believe baptism in holy spirit=speaking in tongues (2 cor 12:11). But I don't believe it's wrong or should b discouraged (2 cor 14: 39) and certainly not forced upon...(which I admit is the reason why others can't stand charismatic ppl)
& it's complex even in the evangelical setting..haha...like how I feel about the knowing god, knowing about god thing..
I don't know.. :)
haha
will pray for the cf thing
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