A confession

I still fondly recall my IMU days; mainly because it was time where I caught a glimpse of God and His heart. Where I was truly passionate for people; for both my student community and the marginalized of the society.
I remember talking with tears of conviction when sharing to fellow friends; hoping to share something that gripped me so much.

Then a different season entired my life. Of pain, till I could feel no more and became numb. Of tears, where I could cry no more.
I still went to church, but I heard words, not truth. Sang but not praise. Gained knowleged but not conviction.

And thus, for 3 years I never could bring myself to go back to Petaling Street Ministry-even though by then my sister was involved.
I could not go to serve the homeless, because I did not know myself what goes God's love meant. How to make sense of God in this broken world. I did not want to say words I did not mean and talk of a God I did not know......

....But....somehow there is a new stirring in my heart. Little reminders in
A church that God has brought me to that is passionate for the lost.
A new young adults cg of ppl who are concerned about social justice
A fellow intern who despite his busy-ness has gone out of his way to befriend the homeless in the city (where as I cannot even be nice to nurses I work with everyday)
A random facebook message about the street ministry
And wonder of wonders, I now have that little teary voice (HAHA) when I talk about what I truly hope for......(although it is quite impossible to happen)

and so even though I do not like to turn my blog into youtube, this song does hold some meaning...especially the words...Stepping forward keep us from just singing

God of Justice, Saviour to all
Came to rescue the weak and the poor
Chose to serve and not be served

Jesus, You have called us
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give

We must go live to feed the hungry
Stand beside the broken
We must go
Stepping forward keep us from just singing
Move us into action
We must go

To act justly everyday
Loving mercy in everyway
Walking humbly before You God

You have shown us, what You require
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give


Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out Lord