No need for words

Was just waiting for a meeting and had some time to grab a coffee (which later gave me tachycardia!) and time to day dream/think/read.

The book somehow reminded me of my father and my elective in his clinic. True it wasn't in the UK with the attractions of travelling around Europe, nor in the adventure of Cambodia which was also considered. It was just in simple Labuan and later GH. It was a choice I made because when else will I ever get a chance to be a medical student again under my father.

It was more than just learning about medicine; but to be mentored under my father. Getting the opportunity to be in the same consulting room, see the different patients that present to the clinic. Seeing how hard he works and how busy he is. Later just having dinner at home.

You see my father isn't a man of many words. We talk but definitely not as much as I do with my mum. Yet it was a great time to just be with him, to observe. where no words needed to be spoken.

How I miss the comfort of family now! Just to hang around doing random things that are so basic like watching TV, eating, fighting occasionally... ;)

From good ole Talley's

When a disease is named after some author, it is very likely we don't know much about it.
August Bier (1861-1949)

Little miss.....

Oh no....

"apperantly"....unless all my family members have conspired....

I....talk in my sleep! :(

Can't laugh at other people anymore for talking in their sleep.

IMU!

The park opposite IMU had a hill where I used to jog up (on the random times where I actually felt rajin enough). During sem3 study break ages ages ages ago, I used to stay up till 7am in the morning, jog, eat hot nasi lemak sold by the pakcik opposite IMU, read my newspapers and then sleep till like 4 in the afternoon. It's not the best for sure..haha

Now there's a 4th story above IMU which used to be our rooftop canteen.

New highway as well and new apartment blocks. And unfortunately the path up to the hill is a bit unsafe with cracks here and there. There's still the nasi lemak thing by the side of the road though with new extensions-chairs and tables!

The past...

Looking back at some old pictures at home, I am struck....

"Why was I better looking last time and not now?!?"

Haha

Musical chairs

So what have I been doing with my holidays?

Every year when I come back, somehow we end up moving house.

This year has been dramatic no thanks to the robbery which made my mother uneasy so we decided to move 2 days after the incident to my "beloved" Vista Commenwealth C where my sister has a room (we were going to move away from Subang anyway but probably only in march 09). Having only 1 small room open, the rest of us slept in the living room. Thankfully the rest of the students were on holidays.

However, they are now back to uni...but in timely providence, my other sister and I are back in Labuan. So although it is still weird that my mum and maid is sleeping in the living room while my sister's housemates are back, we are sort of settled.

Of course it would be inconvenient for the poor students who suddenly have squatters but with God's provision and Eugene's mum's grace, we will soon move to his apartment in Vista B for a few months. Meanwhile my sister's contract at her current apartment ends in February so she will move with us to Vista B...

AND then...we (or rather they as I will be back by then) will move into Vista C to another permenant apartment which we cannot move in atm because it's under contract...................

and meanwhile there are still things in Subang where we will have to move to Vista B temporarily for 1 month before moving it to Vista C

Subang-Vista C-Vista B-Vista C... sums it all up. Phew...haha

Although it's terribly unsettling and have drained me, you know what, we still have a place to stay so ya. God is still gracious. :)

Blast to the past

I arrived today in Labuan, the little island where spent most of my schooling
years. The small, small place where there used to be no Mc Donalds..until recently where there's a 24hr Mc Donalds at the airport and a 24hr KFC! haha..so jakun.

Despite some of the obvious changes, a lot of it remains the same. The same shops, roads.
My house has deteriorated though; paint peeling, rusting metal...after all it's just been my father alone at home for the whole year.

Looking at the stuff at home, I remember some of the things I used to find fascinating; the lamp that lights up on touch, the miniature figurines that we used to get as birthday presents from friends (but is now to be a dust collector!), the videos my sisters and I used to watch over and over and over...it's almost like travelling through time and acknowledging, yes, God, You've brought me through so many changes.

Changes I never expected, some changes I couldn't wait to happen (like going out of Labuan to study and getting so stressed at Pre U that I thought I would fail and just come back and be a nurse at my father's clinic! haha). Painful changes, treasured changes.

In the end, some things I used to love I will find no use for.
And somethings that I never realize its importance will surprise me with its lasting qualities.

Anyway in the meantime..my sister and I might just drive pass McD at 3am..just to satisfy my burning curiosity "Who on earth goes to McDonalds Labuan at 3am!?!?!" haha....

And so...

..this is crime prone Subang Jaya where today my house was robbed.
It happened so fast, as my mother and relative was unloading groceries and the door was opened. The robber just came in with a parang (large knife) and demanded that she go into the room while he broke open the master room door. After grabbing her handback and handphone as well, he even had the guts to scold the next door neighbour who came out to look at the commotion.

I was not at home at the time but I thank God that no one was hurt as you can never know what such people are up to.
They went to the police station but everyone knows that it's not much of a help, just an official report to use to apply for documents.

This is Malaysia where almost a parallel system exists.
Of privately guarded suburbs (not our house), where snatch thieves flourish and are never caught. Where we are resigned to unsafe neighbourhoods and everyone is either a victim of crime or knows someone who was.

Malaysia

The heavy-ish air hangs down with the humidity of the night.
Picking up The Star and giving a little squeal, even though I have read most of the headlines online. Hearing Malay being spoken.

Is this where I've grown up for most of my life? Feels a little different, can a year do so much?
Yet there is a difference. A softness in the heart for the cleaners in KLIA toilets, the conversation with the taxi driver who works at 5am till 12 pm to make ends meet. The sing-song mix of Malay and English...."kamu dari overseas" "Masuk KL traffic jam"

It's Malaysia. For now, my country.

Another tale

Here's another fun tale to tell..haha

So earlier this year, I brought my sister (5 years younger) to Taylor's College to inquire about college enrollments and stuff. After all, this was my college, 5 years ago. (Notice the repeated emphasis on 5 years).

It was the usual, talking to the college recruitment people, some of the teachers there.

Then one of the teachers said "Oh so will you be also considering attending Taylor's College when you finish secondary school?"---pointing to me. At this point, I was going to enter year 5 medicine.

And then later another person said "Are you her younger sister? What do you want to study when you grow up?"

Oh well, it's good to look young......

and take nutty pictures..

Or maybe my sister just looks matured...haha... ;)

Anaesthetists Hymn

:)

Once you upgrade, you can't downgrade

So in a fit of desperation, I bought a slightly more expensive block of cheese ($4.69) from IGA. Which was yum! But then when I bought another random block of cheese from Coles at $3.69, it was so different! Not as soft, or as salty.... Which goes to say, once you upgrade, you can't downgrade.

Oh the randomness

Things I do during study break...

...took 3 showers today
...countless trips to the fridge
...constant checking of emails...yet procrastinating on sending an important one
...clean the house

tsk

Lala

If only that kid was mine..Lol.. ;)

If there's one person who can make me angry...

Some people have commented that they have never seen me angry before and have even asked me if I ever get angry..

Well, haha contrary to public opinion I do get angry and there's probably atm there's only one person who can really make me angry and that's none other than my sister. But it's not in a bad way that I say this..in fact I think the only reason she can get to me is because she's someone close to me and someone whom I would fiercely protect and thus fight with. Someone I love enough to disagree with.

One of the things I am truly blessed with is a close knitted family..where nothing's a secret and where I still call my mum everyday (yup it's been 6 years since I've left home and it's still the same routine! haha). Which is why reading this extract really struck me in a sad way and brought tears to my eyes. Because if it was my sister I will feel the same way too..

"My sister is ten years old. Every morning at seven she goes to the bonded labour man, and every night at nine she comes home. He treats her badly; he hits her if he thinks she is working slowly or if she talks to the other children, he yells at her. He comes looking for her if she is sick and cannot go to work. I don't care about school or playing. I don't care about any of that. All I want is to bring my sister home from the bonded labour man. For 600 rupees (17 dollars) I can bring her home-that is our only chance to get her back. We don't have 600 rupees....we will never have 600 rupess." Lakshmi, nine year old cigarette roller in Tamil Nadu.
From True Grit, pg 31 on Child Labour.

In the midst of all the complaining about exams and what not, I am thankful that I have 17 dollars.

For more sister fun....

I am a klutz

If those out there are wondering what we medical students do everyday; well we just basically sit and observe lots of things and try not to fall asleep or get questioned because we will not know the answer.

And if those in Malaysia wonder what the Australian medical teaching is like; basically we get sent out to a lot of "touchy-feely" stuff like community medicine and preventative care. It's probably an excuse as to why I am so dumb in medicine but I digress because everyone else in Med knows their anatomy and physiology and pharmacology esp those kiasu Singaporean students (or rather student who like for example knows that RF is actually IgM mediated antibody against IgG antibodies... no offence to the rest of the Singaporean population) AND still can do the touchy feely stuff so it must just be me.

But anyway....
The object of all the detours above was because today I went on a visit to a divison of GP set up and went along with the exercise psychiologist. They had a exercise group for mental health participants in a hall and guess what, your's truly was asked to join.

Now, I am already a klutz IN sports attire...worst in clinical clothes of long pants (thank goodness I wore pants and not a skirt or heels). And I have not played much team sports since leaving high school. Needless to say, it was a disaster where I just ran up and down the court, hoping no one will throw the ball at me because I will definately lose it and trying to just not get my feet stepped on. And that was just basketball.....there was soccer after that (wow how aussie-fied I am, I don't even call it football anymore)....but I shall spare myself the humilation of telling it in cyberspace. Haha.

But I guess this is the touchy feely thing about being a medical student. That even in the midst of the influx of info that I will never remember, (or will remember but lose it just when the consultant asks the question) it is learning to be humble enough to play along and be part of patients' lives. Yup sometimes we are merely furnitures in the consulting room or objects of hazards in the operating theater but it trains us to be patient and acknowledge our inexperience.
Even in the times of being scolded or reprimanded over things we did not get taught; those are times we swallow our pride and learn.

So even between throwing lots of air balls and doing star jumps in pin strip pants, it's a lesson as important as learning about Lacunar syndrome or whatever not.


But of course, if I ever do have children I will make sure they are not subjected to such humilation of klutizness and play more sport!

Sculpture by the Sea

Last saturday was simply a beautiful day; not too hot or cold.
Thankful for the simple things in life

His ways are higher than my ways

And I thank God for improvements, for grace and for cooperation. :)

GP land

Doing GP now has made me realize how good my father actually is.
Over in Australia, there's an exam that must be taken to qualify as a GP and the system is such that medicare covers the bulk of the bill.

In Malaysia, it's so much different. The doctor is just not the doctor; but the pharmacist as well, the practice manager, the accountant, the radiologist, the obstetrician, the pediatrician, the geriatrician. Etc etc. Even more in a small island like Labuan.
See all, do all. No radiologist to interpret Xrays, ultrasounds. He even used to do gastroscopies.
The more I learn medicine, the more I realize I don't know anything and how much my dad does.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

On the other hand, I have a sinking feeling that history might repeat itself but ya. Oh well.