the contrast just seems so sharp; having being back and coming to Sydney again.
I don't know if it's just something up with me or that I'm in the wrong place, but I am struggling to connect at church. I guess I'm very Malaysian after all.
And it just gets to me, to hear that my mum's been unwell for the pass 2 days and yet didn't tell me (we talk on the phone or rather VOIP everyday so the omission of information is even more disturbing). I dislike having to find out from other people; yet when I hear it from her myself, I don't know what to say and end up just saying it'd be ok etc.....
It's times like this that I don't even want to evangelize or be a "good" christian, I rather just stay locked up in my room because I can't even hold my life in order......
Do pray for me.
Thanks!
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Thursday, July 19, 2007
In retrospect
Because of luggage weight concerns, I left behind a stack or so of journals and planners, misc cards. But it's been great fun pulling them out and skimming through almost 5 years in writing.
Fretting over matematik tambahan in form 5. Or which uni and what to study after SPM.
Having a best friend who was a Malay girl. Getting angry at being teased with a guy. (haha)
Stressing over SAM, finding footings in IMU...where the 1st entry for IMU was "...I feel so lost because I don't know anyone"
Pulling out cards, the neon green live planner we bought to support Campus Friends.
The names of villages in Cambodia where I went. Remembering the KKB accident. Sheepishly reading how I sometimes felt cf/cg was burdensome or obligatory yet how much I miss and learnt from all the planning and people there. Writing about feeling fat...haha.
Cards from different people. One from Cambodia that I don't dare to reread because it's full of hope yet I've failed him and disappointed their hopes because I'm not going back again for now. (but troy & jonathan's going! always great to hear ppl I know going!).
In many ways, God has brought me through even when I least expected him to.
In others, it's a mixture of both progress and regression.
A reminder that I should start to journal again after being so lazy
Fretting over matematik tambahan in form 5. Or which uni and what to study after SPM.
Having a best friend who was a Malay girl. Getting angry at being teased with a guy. (haha)
Stressing over SAM, finding footings in IMU...where the 1st entry for IMU was "...I feel so lost because I don't know anyone"
Pulling out cards, the neon green live planner we bought to support Campus Friends.
The names of villages in Cambodia where I went. Remembering the KKB accident. Sheepishly reading how I sometimes felt cf/cg was burdensome or obligatory yet how much I miss and learnt from all the planning and people there. Writing about feeling fat...haha.
Cards from different people. One from Cambodia that I don't dare to reread because it's full of hope yet I've failed him and disappointed their hopes because I'm not going back again for now. (but troy & jonathan's going! always great to hear ppl I know going!).
In many ways, God has brought me through even when I least expected him to.
In others, it's a mixture of both progress and regression.
A reminder that I should start to journal again after being so lazy
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Not enough love
Even with two different groups of friends, the same issues keep coming up during dinner/mamak sessions.
Corruption=billions of dollars missing, the rising crime and the horror stories, the state of affairs around, the integrity of courts, religion.
Being overseas have opened my eyes even more; it never bothered me much but being away and coming back, I now notice things I never realized. I never noticed or cared of the significance that everyone in church was of the same ethnicity; on autopilot we just focused on people of our own colour.
It is really sad and sobering to hear of all that's going on.
To know that so much can be improved and yet stay mirred.
Yet are we just merely going to discuss things over dinner, living our comfortable middle class Malaysian lives while plotting for ways to migrate overseas?
I can't answer because I'm not brave enough to say I'll be back.
But I know there's lots to pray for, about.
Forgive me Lord, for I do not love my country enough.
Corruption=billions of dollars missing, the rising crime and the horror stories, the state of affairs around, the integrity of courts, religion.
Being overseas have opened my eyes even more; it never bothered me much but being away and coming back, I now notice things I never realized. I never noticed or cared of the significance that everyone in church was of the same ethnicity; on autopilot we just focused on people of our own colour.
It is really sad and sobering to hear of all that's going on.
To know that so much can be improved and yet stay mirred.
Yet are we just merely going to discuss things over dinner, living our comfortable middle class Malaysian lives while plotting for ways to migrate overseas?
I can't answer because I'm not brave enough to say I'll be back.
But I know there's lots to pray for, about.
Forgive me Lord, for I do not love my country enough.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Moments of wow
Was just catching up with one of dumc's conference cds by Dr David Wang.
"They were talking with each other, but they were not communicating with each other"
Wow, so profound. Are we merely opening our mouths with sounds to fill the silence or are we truly connecting when we engage in conversation?
Another wow sentence, love the way it's phrased..
"In many ways, the Dehs — Kwame, Suzzy and Delight — are unremarkable, average. But in their incredible ability to keep mining Africa's most precious resource — optimism — they are extraordinary. Just like Africa itself." Simon Robinson for TIME Feb 22, 2007.
"They were talking with each other, but they were not communicating with each other"
Wow, so profound. Are we merely opening our mouths with sounds to fill the silence or are we truly connecting when we engage in conversation?
Another wow sentence, love the way it's phrased..
"In many ways, the Dehs — Kwame, Suzzy and Delight — are unremarkable, average. But in their incredible ability to keep mining Africa's most precious resource — optimism — they are extraordinary. Just like Africa itself." Simon Robinson for TIME Feb 22, 2007.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Do you eat the icing first or the biscuit?
It just happen that Yoda asked this question last fri and I saw these biscuits in the pasar malam.Childhood was indeed the best of times. No worries about calories, carcinogenic food colourings or type 2 diabetic inducing icing sugar.
But yea, looking forward to what now has to offer as well. :)
Friday, July 13, 2007
In His time
It feels so good to be back in IMU, to see things that I wanted or dreamed that it would happen all come to past after I leave...(does this mean I'm so bad that things don't happen when I'm around? haha).
I remember scrambling to arrange transport for everyone to go to church, but now there's a bus from IMU to church
The Cg has raised its own leaders
People from CF going for different mission trips
I remember that we always suggested that CF should change its time but never did it, yet now the juniors have CF on fridays and even go for CF till 2 and then have their summative exams right after. I am humbled because it's a sacrifice and an act of trust I myself wouldn't have done.
It just helps to remind me that dreams do come true.
That God is able.
That His timing is right.
That He does know what He's doing after all.
That He will bring to completion what He has started.
I remember scrambling to arrange transport for everyone to go to church, but now there's a bus from IMU to church
The Cg has raised its own leaders
People from CF going for different mission trips
I remember that we always suggested that CF should change its time but never did it, yet now the juniors have CF on fridays and even go for CF till 2 and then have their summative exams right after. I am humbled because it's a sacrifice and an act of trust I myself wouldn't have done.
It just helps to remind me that dreams do come true.
That God is able.
That His timing is right.
That He does know what He's doing after all.
That He will bring to completion what He has started.
Monday, July 09, 2007
It's Malaysia
Riding the rickety non air conditioned yellow mini bus that charges 80cents to get to Sunway.
One of the few Chinese faces in the midst of clerks, retail sales girls, students, elderly ladies.
Eating in food courts, observing what the man next in line is choosing for his meal; aware that his choice of a huge mount of white rice and vegetable curry plus a red ais sirap is more of an economic decision than a gustatory choice.
Over the past year or so my family has been catching buses and walking because we do not have a car in Subang; and don't really want to spend money on taxis if there's a bus route. Once my mother walked to the dentist in the afternoon, a good 15-20 min walk in the sun, a month or so after she finished her chemo...
It's been a great experience learning to live like how most Malaysians live; different from the middle income lifestyle most of us in IMU/college are used to. And a new understanding in how those with RM1000 a month manage to survive while feeding their families of four or more chidren.
Riding the rickety non air conditioned yellow mini bus that charges 80cents to get to Sunway.
One of the few Chinese faces in the midst of clerks, retail sales girls, students, elderly ladies.
Eating in food courts, observing what the man next in line is choosing for his meal; aware that his choice of a huge mount of white rice and vegetable curry plus a red ais sirap is more of an economic decision than a gustatory choice.
Over the past year or so my family has been catching buses and walking because we do not have a car in Subang; and don't really want to spend money on taxis if there's a bus route. Once my mother walked to the dentist in the afternoon, a good 15-20 min walk in the sun, a month or so after she finished her chemo...
It's been a great experience learning to live like how most Malaysians live; different from the middle income lifestyle most of us in IMU/college are used to. And a new understanding in how those with RM1000 a month manage to survive while feeding their families of four or more chidren.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Again
I hardly get ill in Malaysia.
But ever since coming here I've been hit twice with really bad colds that made me lose my voice and now am starting to feel feverish again. I'm just afraid I won't be able to take it when I go back to the sudden change from cold to hot plus the jet lag of a night flight. Won't want to be sick because I have such a short time back. And yea friends who are reading this, I'd love to meet up! Contact me :)
Anyway,
It's great with facebook now that if you don't bring your camera, it's heaps easier to trade pics.
And yea, I love my read coat and it just costs Aud10!
But ever since coming here I've been hit twice with really bad colds that made me lose my voice and now am starting to feel feverish again. I'm just afraid I won't be able to take it when I go back to the sudden change from cold to hot plus the jet lag of a night flight. Won't want to be sick because I have such a short time back. And yea friends who are reading this, I'd love to meet up! Contact me :)
Anyway,
It's great with facebook now that if you don't bring your camera, it's heaps easier to trade pics.
And yea, I love my read coat and it just costs Aud10!
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
We're alike after all
While I've finished my posting at k1ngs cross, there's things to learn from it even now.
Many of the homeless are homeless to a certain extend by choice.
Some choices are based on their psychological addiction but many are made out of habit and instant gratification.
This is glaringly obvious in Australia where there's a strong welfare system; most are entitled to around Aud800-1000 per month from the government and yet are still homeless. Most choose to spend their welfare money on drugs, tobacco, alcohol. The youths choose to be on the streets than to be in hostels. Many refuse to go on methadone because they fear they'd be addicted to it and dislike coming to the clinic everyday to be dosed, but fail to recognize the irony that they are on a 500 a day heroin habit and have to shoot up 3-4 times a day.
It boils back to human choices, our human nature to do things our own way.
And no matter how good the social system is or which country you are in, look close enough and you'd find the same pattern.
In KL, one old man I knew was homeless because he ran away from his old folks home. He just couldn't stand the routine and wanted the freedom to do whatever he liked even though it was far more dangerous and dirty to live in bus stations in Klang and Pudu.
Of course it's so easy to look at them and be bewildered on their seemingly dumb choices.
Just like when we read about the Israelites and wonder why would they worship a man made calf having seen God part the sea into two.
Yet I've becoming more aware that I am just the same like the homeless or the Israelites.
I'd rather rest my trust in a piece of paper, people, events, a specialist training spot or all other illusions of security than the God who's unchanging.
And just like the homeless who rather suffer the bitting cold for a shot of H, I too rather meander around, doubt than to rest in God's arms for His best. Because deep down, God's way does at times seem too hard and agonizingly frustrating. We'd (or I at least, haha) rather have things our way, in our time, in our control.
We are all addicts, merely that some addictions are easier to hide than others.
Many of the homeless are homeless to a certain extend by choice.
Some choices are based on their psychological addiction but many are made out of habit and instant gratification.
This is glaringly obvious in Australia where there's a strong welfare system; most are entitled to around Aud800-1000 per month from the government and yet are still homeless. Most choose to spend their welfare money on drugs, tobacco, alcohol. The youths choose to be on the streets than to be in hostels. Many refuse to go on methadone because they fear they'd be addicted to it and dislike coming to the clinic everyday to be dosed, but fail to recognize the irony that they are on a 500 a day heroin habit and have to shoot up 3-4 times a day.
It boils back to human choices, our human nature to do things our own way.
And no matter how good the social system is or which country you are in, look close enough and you'd find the same pattern.
In KL, one old man I knew was homeless because he ran away from his old folks home. He just couldn't stand the routine and wanted the freedom to do whatever he liked even though it was far more dangerous and dirty to live in bus stations in Klang and Pudu.
Of course it's so easy to look at them and be bewildered on their seemingly dumb choices.
Just like when we read about the Israelites and wonder why would they worship a man made calf having seen God part the sea into two.
Yet I've becoming more aware that I am just the same like the homeless or the Israelites.
I'd rather rest my trust in a piece of paper, people, events, a specialist training spot or all other illusions of security than the God who's unchanging.
And just like the homeless who rather suffer the bitting cold for a shot of H, I too rather meander around, doubt than to rest in God's arms for His best. Because deep down, God's way does at times seem too hard and agonizingly frustrating. We'd (or I at least, haha) rather have things our way, in our time, in our control.
We are all addicts, merely that some addictions are easier to hide than others.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Sunday, June 17, 2007
A night out
The sirens wail while blue and red neon lights flash.
It's hard to distinguish if it's from the garrish signs or from patrol cars.
Outside the clouds of carcinogen wafts through.
You become street smart; the addicts, the girls..it's easier to know who's who now.
A row breaks out.
You just learn to ignore and duck away.
The winter chill wheezes through.
The darkness amplifies the glarring signboards.
We get on the bus.
It's almost like a mission adventure. It's even funny how they call this the outreach bus.
The hours are long. Seemingly frightening at first, but the a sort of mutual understanding between them and the service allays fears. There's no gurantee however, cravings can overtake cognition.
Needles, condoms are distributed.
The ignorant me never knew what were dams, the different sizes of rubber, or even the details of men2men s3x or girl2girl action. Or that the going price for full service was a mere 50.
We take our packs and go by foot. Into the "safe" houses.
The girls mill around, at least it's warmer here. Outside some wait, they must be chilled to the bone in their costumes. I am, in 3 layers while they fight the cold in less than one.
It's almost midnight. I take leave, won't want to miss the bus home.
With the stories I hear and see happening, imaginations must be surpressed as I cross the park alone.
But I arrive home safe and warm.
Again, it's amazing I got this placement because IMU students were not given a choice when the rest were cuz we were extras. While others are doing geriatric rehabs or reproductive, diabetes clinics, I'm dispensing methadone.
It's hard to distinguish if it's from the garrish signs or from patrol cars.
Outside the clouds of carcinogen wafts through.
You become street smart; the addicts, the girls..it's easier to know who's who now.
A row breaks out.
You just learn to ignore and duck away.
The winter chill wheezes through.
The darkness amplifies the glarring signboards.
We get on the bus.
It's almost like a mission adventure. It's even funny how they call this the outreach bus.
The hours are long. Seemingly frightening at first, but the a sort of mutual understanding between them and the service allays fears. There's no gurantee however, cravings can overtake cognition.
Needles, condoms are distributed.
The ignorant me never knew what were dams, the different sizes of rubber, or even the details of men2men s3x or girl2girl action. Or that the going price for full service was a mere 50.
We take our packs and go by foot. Into the "safe" houses.
The girls mill around, at least it's warmer here. Outside some wait, they must be chilled to the bone in their costumes. I am, in 3 layers while they fight the cold in less than one.
It's almost midnight. I take leave, won't want to miss the bus home.
With the stories I hear and see happening, imaginations must be surpressed as I cross the park alone.
But I arrive home safe and warm.
Again, it's amazing I got this placement because IMU students were not given a choice when the rest were cuz we were extras. While others are doing geriatric rehabs or reproductive, diabetes clinics, I'm dispensing methadone.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
A curl
There's just something special in the simplicity of curling up in front of the heater while the rain patters outside, with the guitar and just playing songs that come up randomly. (oh no, is it the cause of the rain? haha)
Haven't heard nor remembered this song for a long long time! But it's the song for this week I reckon after a really weird, fear ridden week (with death, the reminder that I lost another friend that way a few years ago & I prowled the streets alone at 11 pm!).
I have made You too small in my eyes
Oh Lord, forgive me
And I have believed in a lie
That You are unable to help me.
But now, Oh Lord, I see my wrong
Heal my heart and show Yourself strong
And in my eyes and with my song
Oh Lord, be magnified (bis)
Chorus:
Be magnified, Oh Lord
You are highly exalted
And there is nothing You can't do
Oh Lord, my eyes are on You
Be magnified,
Oh Lord, be magnified
I have leaned on a wisdom of men
Oh Lord, forgive me
And I have responded to them
Instead of Your light and Your mercy
But now, Oh Lord, I see my wrong
Heal my heart and show yourself strong
And in my eyes and in my song
Oh Lord be magnified
Haven't heard nor remembered this song for a long long time! But it's the song for this week I reckon after a really weird, fear ridden week (with death, the reminder that I lost another friend that way a few years ago & I prowled the streets alone at 11 pm!).
I have made You too small in my eyes
Oh Lord, forgive me
And I have believed in a lie
That You are unable to help me.
But now, Oh Lord, I see my wrong
Heal my heart and show Yourself strong
And in my eyes and with my song
Oh Lord, be magnified (bis)
Chorus:
Be magnified, Oh Lord
You are highly exalted
And there is nothing You can't do
Oh Lord, my eyes are on You
Be magnified,
Oh Lord, be magnified
I have leaned on a wisdom of men
Oh Lord, forgive me
And I have responded to them
Instead of Your light and Your mercy
But now, Oh Lord, I see my wrong
Heal my heart and show yourself strong
And in my eyes and in my song
Oh Lord be magnified
Thursday, May 31, 2007
While it is easy..
...to gloss over Lina Joy's case cuz
1) it doesn't change anything for me
2) so what?
3) it's good debate and reading material
4) merely something to think about
& especially because our newspapers report it as if it's just merely a landmark case, a test of the judiciary, impersonal...
I forget that behind it all is a woman who's making true sacrifice.
Because more than just the verdict, but the consequence of the verdict.
Would you fight it even if it meant you couldn't get married to your beloved for 7 long years?
What's she going to do now?
A faceless hero.
1) it doesn't change anything for me
2) so what?
3) it's good debate and reading material
4) merely something to think about
& especially because our newspapers report it as if it's just merely a landmark case, a test of the judiciary, impersonal...
I forget that behind it all is a woman who's making true sacrifice.
Because more than just the verdict, but the consequence of the verdict.
Would you fight it even if it meant you couldn't get married to your beloved for 7 long years?
What's she going to do now?
A faceless hero.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Meeting a celebritiy
Again, the clinic is never short of surprises...
Was in a consult and as he talked, I had a feeling I've read about this somewhere....
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/6676267.stm
And true enough it was the man in person.
Was in a consult and as he talked, I had a feeling I've read about this somewhere....
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/6676267.stm
And true enough it was the man in person.
Monday, May 28, 2007
Oversight
The wheels squeak pass and the music blares.
Shinny colourful packages scream "Pick me!"
Rows and rows of dehydrated "bad for your health but you eat it anyway" noodles with every kind of imaginable flavour are on display. You search for a familiar name.
"Ah ha!" It's here after all!
Images of a cold winter night with a bowl of hot steaming goodness fills your mind. Red slurply spiciness is the remedy to all cold blahs.
Woolworth ain't that bad after all you think.
And you pay for it. And bring it home. And put it in your cupboard. Oblivious.
And only after a while when you actually want to cook it you realize with a gasp...
"IT'S NOT MAGGI CURRY!"
The impostor!
Thankfully you're not greedy & only bought 1 packet!
And as a punishment, the impostor sits unopened in a dark cupboard because somehow tomato flavoured maggi just doesn't sound appealing.
:)
Shinny colourful packages scream "Pick me!"
Rows and rows of dehydrated "bad for your health but you eat it anyway" noodles with every kind of imaginable flavour are on display. You search for a familiar name.
"Ah ha!" It's here after all!
Images of a cold winter night with a bowl of hot steaming goodness fills your mind. Red slurply spiciness is the remedy to all cold blahs.
Woolworth ain't that bad after all you think.
And you pay for it. And bring it home. And put it in your cupboard. Oblivious.
And only after a while when you actually want to cook it you realize with a gasp...
"IT'S NOT MAGGI CURRY!"
The impostor!Thankfully you're not greedy & only bought 1 packet!
And as a punishment, the impostor sits unopened in a dark cupboard because somehow tomato flavoured maggi just doesn't sound appealing.
:)
Friday, May 25, 2007
Peel back a bit more
"Oh you are going back even though hols are just for 2 weeks?"
A rush of heat, a prickle of anger escapes.
A dozen of comebacks form.
A sarcastic thought pops "oh, how I wish I was going back simply because I am spoilt and because I have nothing better to do with my money. But I'm going back because she has cancer."
But she decides, just keep quiet, it's not intended after all. Gulp down.
A random article pops in the paper.
An author with the same cancer. Same type even. Same treatment, and twice reoccurance even with treatment.
Another sinking feeling.
People mill about.
How are yous are thrown.
She hesitates.
I'll save my story for another day.
The battle she's fought to be strong.
The distance she deliberately created.
She will not be like other girls who cling on, pester.
No, she won't beg.
She'll stand on her own two feet if he won't stand with her.
The inner wars.
To not blame God. To not blame anyone.
To not blame herself.
To not demand answers.
To still try and try and try to see that there is, there is a silver lining in life.
And maybe that's why the sky does seem bluer, and the flowers brighter,
because when everything has been taken away, the little things become precious.
She knows many will not understand.
But she understands as well why many don't.
She didn't after all, she was far too overwhelmed complaining about exams, about futures of international medical students overseas, where she'll work, about bgrs, about studies, about vista and crappy imu food even! (haha)...about everything worth complaining about until cancer hit her.
And now she truly gets it.
It really hurts.
It really really does.
This is what real pain feels like.
Other things are really frivolous.
She's still tempted at times to think that she has the worst lot in life.
And she knows how dangerous it can be.
After all, no one will fault her for being bitter. Who dares to say anything against her when the word cancer is attached to her last name. She can get away with a lot of complaining! :)
And she knows how judgmental she can be as well when hearing other people's complaints, forgetting that she was once at the same place.
But she knows, she is blessed despite all that has happened.
She won't complain about the cold spell because her patients don't even have a house.
How can she even compare? A man who had swollen legs all the way to his knees because he walked all night because he didn't have a home; it was too dangerous to sleep at night because he'd be raped.
Yes she wished she didn't have to walk alone, yet when she hear the stories of those who were beaten, betrayed and sold on the streets by those they love, she knows their pain is far, far deeper.
Some days she succeeds.
Far more good days than bad now.
Sometimes it still painful. Really painful. She knows most will gloss it over, and again she knows no one understands except those who have walked such paths.
And despite how independent she'd like to be, she knows she can't do it perfectly.
She's still human, she's still a girl.
But because she can't, God can.
A rush of heat, a prickle of anger escapes.
A dozen of comebacks form.
A sarcastic thought pops "oh, how I wish I was going back simply because I am spoilt and because I have nothing better to do with my money. But I'm going back because she has cancer."
But she decides, just keep quiet, it's not intended after all. Gulp down.
A random article pops in the paper.
An author with the same cancer. Same type even. Same treatment, and twice reoccurance even with treatment.
Another sinking feeling.
People mill about.
How are yous are thrown.
She hesitates.
I'll save my story for another day.
The battle she's fought to be strong.
The distance she deliberately created.
She will not be like other girls who cling on, pester.
No, she won't beg.
She'll stand on her own two feet if he won't stand with her.
The inner wars.
To not blame God. To not blame anyone.
To not blame herself.
To not demand answers.
To still try and try and try to see that there is, there is a silver lining in life.
And maybe that's why the sky does seem bluer, and the flowers brighter,
because when everything has been taken away, the little things become precious.
She knows many will not understand.
But she understands as well why many don't.
She didn't after all, she was far too overwhelmed complaining about exams, about futures of international medical students overseas, where she'll work, about bgrs, about studies, about vista and crappy imu food even! (haha)...about everything worth complaining about until cancer hit her.
And now she truly gets it.
It really hurts.
It really really does.
This is what real pain feels like.
Other things are really frivolous.
She's still tempted at times to think that she has the worst lot in life.
And she knows how dangerous it can be.
After all, no one will fault her for being bitter. Who dares to say anything against her when the word cancer is attached to her last name. She can get away with a lot of complaining! :)
And she knows how judgmental she can be as well when hearing other people's complaints, forgetting that she was once at the same place.
But she knows, she is blessed despite all that has happened.
She won't complain about the cold spell because her patients don't even have a house.
How can she even compare? A man who had swollen legs all the way to his knees because he walked all night because he didn't have a home; it was too dangerous to sleep at night because he'd be raped.
Yes she wished she didn't have to walk alone, yet when she hear the stories of those who were beaten, betrayed and sold on the streets by those they love, she knows their pain is far, far deeper.
Some days she succeeds.
Far more good days than bad now.
Sometimes it still painful. Really painful. She knows most will gloss it over, and again she knows no one understands except those who have walked such paths.
And despite how independent she'd like to be, she knows she can't do it perfectly.
She's still human, she's still a girl.
But because she can't, God can.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
A picture or two
I really really love the scene around my hospital.
Paddington/Oxford Street/Darlinghurst is just amazing; retro 2nd hand bookshops where you can buy paperback murder mysteries for Aud1!, quirky small cafes with amazing varieties of coffee (decaf soy vanilla latte anyone?), posh stand alone boutiques. Thai eateries, Italian restaurants, Sushi corners, Indian takeaways, organic foodshop.
Beautiful parks & quaint little houses. Lots of vibe: UNSW art school & the National Gallery nearby. Unique ancient buildings yet only 10 min walk to the city.
This place has the highest concentration of g@y/alternative lifestyle. Mardi Gras starts here every year. The rainbow colours represents the alternative lifestyle & something new I found out: carrying an umbrella with rainbow colours is a symbol of support.
This is my hospital: modern & sleek
& the classical looking medical education building which is the former hospital building. & they r side by side each other
The park opposite the hospital.It's just sooo pretty and nice, I love my walks from the bus to the hospital. But the contrast is unbelievable... while it's quite an expensive area because it's in the city it's also a hot spot for drug use and homelessness. While walking 2 days ago, I saw a dead body & police in the park. Which is really such a shame because the hospital was just less than 20 meters away!
And this doesn't even cover my placement location 5 min away from the hospital, which is even more hip & interesting!
The experience is just confronting, amazing & never boring!
today someone OD in the toilet & thankfully someone else realized & saved the man's life.
Yea, basically I'm at a s3x & drug clinic at K1ngscro$ (symbols r deliberate to prevent search engine spammers)
K1ng's Cro$s has for a long time been known to most Australians as the drugs and red light capital of Australia. Most Australians who have visited $ydney at one time or another have wandered through the Cross, if only for a look at how the "other half" live and play. In recent years, however, this sleezy pocket of Sydney has started to evolve, albeit ever so slowly, into a richly vibrant part of the city. The strip clubs, tople$s waitresses, adult bookshops and tacky nightclubs are still there, but small, trendy cafes have sprung up on the fringes of the Cross that are attracting a different type of visitor. The Cross is most sleazy at night, when the bright lights come on and the action hots up. During the day it can look a lot less threatening.
Visitors to the area should be careful, especially at night, as people do get mugged here. The other thing to be careful of is the spuikers outside nightclubs: they can be intimidating and aggressive and have been a problem in recent times.
from: http://www.sydney.com.au/kingsx.htmWednesday, May 16, 2007
God given
Guess where I am at for 6 weeks for my society & health placement?
And what's really amazing about this is that I was not given a choice on where to go and was randomly placed BUT, you can't escape where God wants you to be I guess.
There's just so much to see & experience, to reflect as a Christian on how much love is needed, on how confronting it can be, and yet precisely because of this so many Christians are needed in this field. I thought I have seen everything in KL, but no I am proven wrong!
Was both nauseated by the scale of things but also so much more aware and in awe of Jesus because this is where he would be, this is where he would have ministered. It's a good jolt to the system, to be reminded and to be soft hearted.
Yup, would want to put in pics of the place and all so I won't want to spoil the surprise of where my placement is at...haha, though some would probably guess already.
Just a teaser: On the 1st day of my placement we had a sit down with the manager to be briefed on the policies we have to obey. Expected it to be: be professional, turn up on time etc, the usual....
BUT, no...turns out my partner and I had to sign a form that..........we will not have sex with our clients (patients) or solicit sex from them.
yea...
And what's really amazing about this is that I was not given a choice on where to go and was randomly placed BUT, you can't escape where God wants you to be I guess.
There's just so much to see & experience, to reflect as a Christian on how much love is needed, on how confronting it can be, and yet precisely because of this so many Christians are needed in this field. I thought I have seen everything in KL, but no I am proven wrong!
Was both nauseated by the scale of things but also so much more aware and in awe of Jesus because this is where he would be, this is where he would have ministered. It's a good jolt to the system, to be reminded and to be soft hearted.
Yup, would want to put in pics of the place and all so I won't want to spoil the surprise of where my placement is at...haha, though some would probably guess already.
Just a teaser: On the 1st day of my placement we had a sit down with the manager to be briefed on the policies we have to obey. Expected it to be: be professional, turn up on time etc, the usual....
BUT, no...turns out my partner and I had to sign a form that..........we will not have sex with our clients (patients) or solicit sex from them.
yea...
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